Our first true Love in Life, we think about forever, we remember and we compare other Loves to it. Most of you may be recalling your first crush, your first boyfriend or girlfriend or even your spouse. It is that time of year when we notice those whom we love and who loves us. We remember past mistakes, past gifts, past hurts. We take time out of our day to play old memories, or hope for new ones. What we may be overlooking. Our first Love is Self Love.
Whether we were taught this in life or not, is not as important as what we do with this information today. We can only give freely that which we are willing and able to give to ourselves. How do you give your Love to others? It is telling of how you give Love to yourself. Do you only give to those who give it back to you? Do you take it away when you are feeling hurt? What do you do when someone gives you Love? Do you shy away, laugh it off, or embrace it openly and happily? Take some time to write down ways in which you give and receive Love, attention, affection, and time to yourself and to others. You will begin to see patterns emerge, and this exercise will bring about new awareness on how you actually give Love to yourself.
Once you have taken some time to notice how you respond to and give Love, you will be one step closer to yourself. If you're ready to make healthy changes to how you give and receive, it must start with how you Love yourself.
It is time to look in the mirror; time to start appreciating yourself. Every day as you start your routine you find yourself in front of the mirror and this time we are going to do something different! Instead of telling yourself what you find wrong, look and find what is right. Pick something you appreciate about yourself, it can be anything, your eye color, your hair style, your height. It matters not what it is, but that you truly Love it about yourself. Each day say to yourself "I Love (this) about me!". Give yourself a minute to really feel how much you enjoy this part of you! Now look yourself in the eyes and add in: I Love you (your name). You don't even have to do this out loud in the beginning. If you're finding it difficult start anywhere. You will notice your ability to give and receive Love will open up!
Follow up on this morning exercise with a gift to yourself of five minutes. It doesn't have to be right away, but it does need to be at least once a day. Take this time alone to breathe deep: feel the air fill your lungs and leave your lungs. Notice the air pass your lips; is it cold or warm? Is there a scent in the air? Are you breathing fast or slow? Keep your awareness on your breath. If your mind wanders, take notice, and without anger, let it pass as you refocus on your breathing. As you do this, allow your breathing to fall into a slow, natural rhythm. This form of self Love will not only be relaxing, but also has many other healthy benefits*. Showing yourself that you are worth this time every day will open you up to more Loving relationships; not only with yourself, but with others as well!
The last tip we want to share is a fun one. Start Celebrating Everything! Take time each day to celebrate little things like: green lights on the way to work, your hot cup of coffee, or the fact you found both your shoes and your keys today with ease! I know it might sound simple, and maybe a bit silly, but when we celebrate small things and take the time to appreciate something going good, the more we are able to give that gift to others when they are in need of support and Love.
What we are willing to do for ourselves we are willing to do for others. When we take the time to Love ourselves, we give ourselves permission to Love others! As we continue to show kindness, Love, affection, appreciation and gratitude we are able to gift it more freely to those around us. So take time today to show how full of Love you are for yourself, and celebrate the fact you are giving time for it!
Blessings & Love,
Rebecca L. Allen
Love the Process
Featured in February 2013's publication of South Shore and Cape Cod Metaphysics